Maybe In My Locker?

Sometimes, I feel like I've lost my humanity.

Where is it?

Where the bloody hell is it...

Seriously.

I'm passing out next week. 5.5 months of hell and back are over.

But I'm like ..... "erm, yeah okay."

The wonderful month of Ramadhan is soon upon us.

But again I'm like "erm, yeah okay."

And other small stuff...

The little burst hose during the ship firefighting exercise. I just stared at my friend struggling with it. No feeling of wanting to help or anything. The me from months ago would've dashed to his aid.

The old man yesterday struggling with some stuff he collected (I guess he's a hoarder). He was trying to get into the lift. I just got off a lift. I simply walked away without any feeling or desire to assist the poor old man. Again, the old me would've lent him a hand.

But then again, I feel guilty now...

So is my humanity still here with me after all?

But why does it sorta go away at times? :(

Ya Allah, perhaps I am a fool to have not sought your guidance and assistance earlier. Please forgive me, O' Most Merciful and Most Forgiving.