The Final Leg...

Well, here it comes, lads. 2012 is drawing to a close. Much shite has come to pass upon me and the rest of the world. Very much shite.

It's a funny thing how a retrospective always makes time seem to go by in a flash. Things seem to have come and gone so quickly that if you hadn't stayed still for a while to take notice, you wouldn't have realised they had even taken place.

I spent most of my 2012 being paid $1.2k a month to do $100 worth of work. Putting up with assholes and having a great time with my buddies at work and doing shite I've never imagined myself doing. Learnt a lot about myself and my abilities at handling people. And then there's those shite I never ever foresaw myself doing. Like consciously keeping myself fit, being the ultimate saikang warrior and learning CPR.

At the end of the day, it all ended with my ORD. I've moved away from all that and now into a period of my life where important decisions and actions have to be taken. It's been, in truth, an almost seamless transition between life in the SRP to normal, jobless civilian life. Working 10 days per month for a year and 4 months helps. A LOT. I barely feel any difference.

But I do feel lost. Fucking lost.

Where do I go? What do I do from here on out? How should I shape my life? Where do I see myself in the future? Once you get your IC back, it's not all lush meadows and rainbows. If you don't make plans for yourself and execute them double time, you're done for. I feel more pressured. Even more than I've ever felt being in the platoon.

You'll try to collect your thoughts and see the countless paths ahead of you. But you have no idea which will lead you to where you wanna go in life.

My goal in life is to do something I love while knowing that my job contributes to the community and people. Also, I wanna provide well for my family, have them live healthily with some measure of luxury. I wanna repay the debts I owe to my parents who have been taking good care of me all my life so far. I wanna be a good Muslim and I wanna give all I can to the poor and needy. I wanna make the world a better place. If not the world, then at least my world.

But getting there won't be a cakewalk and yes, there is still much shite to be done.

2013. It's gonna be a scary year for me.

Happy New Year, Danny man. All the best to you and for your future endeavours.